This One's For the Girls....

You are killing all of my wonder. (KILLER!!)

Shortie got a job, shortie got a car, shortie can pay her own rent....I just want real love.

Different from the ones before - cause I know she loves the Lord - she's THAT kind of girl

And it's all your fault I screen my phone calls - no matter who calls I screen my phone calls

Forever and ever - you'll stay in my heart - and I will love you forever and ever...

Playing with matches, a girl can get BURNED. So bring me no ring, groom me no groom, find me no find, catch me no catch - unless he's a matchless match

Because I knew you - I have been changed for good

No matter what I'm wearin' I will always be Beeeeeethanyyyyyy

I could not love you any better, I love you just the way you are

I'd gladly give up my freedom - to be held in your captivity

When I am weak, unable to speak, still I can call You by name.

Could it be that He is only waiting there to see if I will learn to love the dreams that He has dreamed for me?

Oh, but you don't know what's coming. Don't you know the One who holds tomorrow?

Lord, I know if you change my mind, You will change my heart in time.

How deep the Father's love for us - how VAST beyond all measure.

You're beautiful the way you are.

My surroundings

This might say something about me - might not. I'm opening myself up for psychoanalysis!

Things on my Bulletin Board:

• Worship Schedules
• Staff phone directory
• Black and White old New York City calendar (I always get one of these from World Market - it lets me travel by turning my head. This month's is Grand Central Station - with the light pouring in. LOVE IT!)
• A flower made from popped balloons (from 40 Days of Purpose)
• Pictures from 3 weddings - Melissa, cousin Sarah, and Orange & Blue
• Estefani - my Compassion kid
• A card that says: "Pray for...Young Adult Ministry at West Side & Young Adults in the Community" from vision night #1 back in the day!
• A sticker that says, "I voted" (I had to beg for that...)
• A picture of Melissa and I in the infamous yellow office
• A picture from lunch at Granny's
• A birthday note from Phil (2003)
• A cross ornament from Spear
• The Beattitudes art from the first Gathering (which still looks awesome, Kara)
• A cartoon about lipstick that was given to me by a woman who was trying to win me over to her lipstick side (I still don't wear it)
• A small piece of paper where Melissa wrote her married name about 6 months before her wedding. I used to look at it to get used to it. I think it helped.
• An Illini basetball poster from the 2003-2004 season
• A cross-stitched piece from MaryAnn
• Phone numbers for people that I never called (mostly high school acquantances
• A dried red rose

Things on my Computer monitor:

• A pink piece of paper with Psalm 86:11-13 on it - Diane B. put it on there for the women's conference
• An index card that says: "Clarity of Mission flows from purity of worship" - I still don't know who said that...
• 2 fortune cookie fortunes (I LOVE fortune cookie fortunes): "You'll never know what you can do until you try" and "Your love life will be happy and harmonious."

So what do you think this says about me??

Hungry Girl

**Public service announcement**

I'd like to make a recommendation. If you visit the Hungry Girl website - you can sign up for daily emails with suggestions about eating healthy and exercise. But they're super-fun. They've got product reviews, tips for eating out, all kinds of fun things.

The end.

I love my job

Today was one of those days...and I just need to remember it - because I love my job:

• Great response from the artist yesterday - praise God... (and I'm amazed at the power of art...and of people surrendering their gifts in corporate worship)
• "I see orange and blue events in the future. Bad Mike..."
• Imo's is the new place for lunch...but don't tell too many people
• "What is that? Please make it stop!"
• "I Need You" - The Swift
• "Made for You" - Watermark
• The calypso Easter song...and lots of laughter

Mr. T

Facts about Mr. T:

• When Mr. T folds his arms, the U.S. Terror Alert Level is raised to gold.
• Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.
• Mr. T. does not break wind. He destroys it.
• Mr. T hates playing 'Rock Paper Scissors' because he doesn't believe anything could beat rock. He always chooses rock, and when someone throws paper, he says, "I win." If someone is foolish enough to dispute this, he takes his clenched fist and punches them in the face, then says, "I thought your paper would protect you."
• Children are afraid of the dark. Dark is afraid of Mr. T.
• Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.
• Mr. T pities fools because even fools deserve their daily dose of vitamin T.
• Mr. T doesn't pity anyone who likes the Black Eyed Peas. He just kills them.
• Mr T. and Chuck Norris decided to spar; they traveled to the only safe place in the Universe, the beginning of time. They bowed to each other and Chuck launched in with a roundhouse kick. Mr. T blocked it, and the resulting pressure wave is commonly called the Big Bang.
• Mr.T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr.T in the chest. The result was the 80's.
• Mr. T's chains are not made of gold, they are actually made of curium, one of the heaviest elements in existence. They were put there by the CIA to slow him down, and you're lucky they do, fool.
• Human females have two X chromosomes. Males have an X and a Y. Mr. T has three Ys and a T. He's more man than you'll ever be.
• When creating the alphabet, Mr. T placed the letters M, R, and T in separate areas so people could learn to read and spell without fear.
• Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.
• When Mr. T received his star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, he made his hand prints after the cement was dry.
• Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is too afraid to shine on him.
• Mr. T coined the phrase, "I see dead people," after the waiting staff at Denny's forgot his birthday.
• Mr. T doesn't breathe, air just hides in his lungs for protection.
• Mr. T isn't afraid of flying, but God fears the consequences of letting him fall.
• Mr. T is the reason the sky is blue. Don't ask stupid questions.
• On the A-team, Face, Haniabal, and Murdoch were all masters of disguise. Mr T didn't have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn't recognize him out of fear.
• There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is going to walk.
• Mr. T was once involved in a head-on car crash, and he was the only survivor. Mr. T was walking at the time.
• Mr. T doesn't need an ATM card. He just walks up to the machine, crosses his arms, stares at it, and money comes out.
• Mr. T puts the laughter in manslaughter.
• Mr. T always drives on the right side of the road, no matter where he is in the world.
• Mr. T's edition of the VH1 show 'Where Are They Now' was the shortest in the show's history. It was 10 seconds long, and consisted of a black screen with the words "Right Behind You" written on it.
• Mr. T made his van go twice the speed of light because he wanted to prove that quantum physics was a bunch of jibba jabba.

You can read all about it - about how boy meets girl and then...

Just found some online articles about the nature of Christian "dating" or whatever you want to call it - and thought I'd share. I like it when people can say things more articulately than I ever could.

The first is from Boundless (they tend towards the more conservative side - but pretty good nonetheless): http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001200.cfm - "Not Your Buddy."

I've heard it said that it is difficult for men and women to be very good friends without at least one of them having interest in more. I think as a generalization, that's probably true. Anyways, I liked how this article calls out girls to go into friendships with guys with eyes open - rather than just seeing what they want to. He's just not that into you, right? However, I do think the roles could occasionally be reversed (the girl enjoying the attention with the guy hoping there's more).

The second is from ChristianityToday - and is co-written by 2 single Christians: http://www.christianitytoday.com/singles/newsletter/mind60111.html - "State of the Date"

It's been a few days since I read it - but I liked their honesty.

And now to finish the quote from the post title: "He screws the whole thing up...just like always" ;o)

Selections from tonight's compline

The Reading
"He comes to us as One unknown, without a name, as of old, by the lakeside, He came to those men who knew Him not. He speaks to us the same word: "Follow thou me!" and sets us the tasks which he has to fulfill for our time. He commands. And to those who obey Him, whether they be wise or simple, He will reveal Himself in the toils, the conflicts, the sufferings which they will pass through in his fellowship, and, as an ineffable mystery, they shall learn in their own experience Who He is." - Albert Schweitzer

The Small Verse
Into your hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit; for you have redeemed me, O Lord, O God of truth. Keep me, O Lord, as the apple of your eye; hide me under the shadow of your wings.

The Petition
Watch, O Lord, with those who wake, or watch, or weep tonight, and give Your angels and saints charge over those who sleep. Tend Your sick ones, O Lord Christ. Rest Your weary ones. Bless Your dying ones. Soothe Your suffering ones. Shield Your joyous ones, and all for Your love's sake. Amen.

SLACKER

Okay - This post is going to have whiny elements - so tune out if you don't want to hear any of that.

I want to be done with school. I've felt this at various other assorted times in my life - but I never meant it as much as I do right now. No more. Isn't it May already?
I don't have a good attitude about it. If I could express my most profound thoughts about school right now, it would be this: "Ughaughiwalgggnuwalgugh..."

And I really do want to make the most of my remaining time. I have a tendency to do "just enough" and have a "whatever it takes to get it done" rather than maximizing it. Finishing strong is what I'd like - but my heart is NOT in this right now...

So this post is just a snapshot of my temporary frustration - and hopefully someday (in the not-so-far future) I can look back and say, "Man, I'm glad I'm done with school."

And now - off to work on getting closer to May....

Patty

I got a Patty Griffin CD from my brother for Christmas. He always hooks me up with good music. While this album, Living With Ghosts, is the first one I've heard all the way through - I already knew one of her songs. {Kara - it's track 10 on your driving mix.}

(These lyrics aren't really indicative of anything in my life right now...just want to share them.)

Rain
It's hard to listen to a hard hard heart
Beating close to mine
Pounding up against the stone and steel
Walls that I won't climb
Sometimes a hurt is so deep deep deep
You think that you're gonna drown
Sometimes all I can do is weep weep weep
With all this rain falling down

Strange how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
But I'm holding on underneath this shroud
Rain

It's hard to know when to give up the fight
Some things you want will just never be right
It's never rained like it has to night before
Now I won't beg you baby
For something maybe you could never give
I'm not looking for the rest of your life
I just want another chance to live

Strange how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
But I'm holding on underneath this shroud
Rain

Strange how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
But I'm still in love underneath this shroud
Rain

Merci madame Kara

I don't speak French. In fact, I think it sounds funny.
But I'd like to give a brief "merci beaucoup" (or whatever) to my "amie", Kara.

• Merci pour your quotes from Henri Nouwen - makes me remember how much I like that book
• Merci pour the lovely candle - a totally random surprise
• Merci pour being the first person to hunt me down in cyberspace that I know in real life (at least that I know of...eek...)
• Merci pour that trip to Indy - may we continue to travel together...
• Merci pour your listening ears
• Merci pour your enjoyment of the Wicked soundtrack.
• Merci pour your friendship
• Merci pour a lovely note that I DID NOT UNDERSTAND AT ALL BECAUSE IT'S IN FRENCH!!! ;o)

Au revoir.

Memories

I had meant to do a 2005 retrospective - mostly for my own memory's sake. However, this post will not be that.

I had several people give me digital pictures today (I need a digital camera!). There's something about pictures that takes me back and makes me all sentimental. My sister Rebekah gave me some pics from this past Christmas, and Melissa found a CD of pictures from our trip to Las Vegas back in July 04.


The kids. I love the look on Josh's face. And no, I don't know why I'm not looking at the camera.







My mom, uncle, and Nana (who turns 98 this month).
How cute are they?? Seriously!










Cute.










There's a level of comfort I feel in these pictures that I can't quite put into words.