The Marinator

I've been to Chambana twice in the last week and a half. Highly unusual. I've enjoyed it - but most of it was shopping in downtown Champaign. I want to go back when I can wander on my own and possibly connect with some old friends.

This is a pic of Mary with her Marching Illini hat. She cracks me up.

I love that town - but things change so fast there - it's inevitable nostalgia/reality check. Mary says I'm just old.
I hope to make it to a football game this year. Had to turn down tickets for this Saturday's game b/c I'll be at a wedding. As I'm typing this - "What is Hip" by the MI came up on iTunes.

I love campus in the fall.

a little perspective

Worth your time to watch: http://www.worldonfire.ca/
(Sarah McLachlan - "World on Fire" video)

I found this interesting in light of an email I saw today - from someone who asked why the church spends so much money on buildings for themselves and things within the U.S. - and seems to ignore world poverty and hunger.

It's a good question. We can't claim ignorance.
What should ministry here in America look like in light of the world?
What's my role in all of that?

Randoms from the Last Week

• I like the State Fair...especially when it doesn't feel like August. I went 2 nights in a row last week with lots of fun people. Highlights: watching random people dance in the Twilight Ballroom and going on rides w/ friends' kids. Yeah, Tilt-o-whirl!
• I have been feeling un-cool somewhat regularly. I've traditionally been okay with that - but every now and then I have junior high/high school thoughts about needing to "fit in." But at the end of the day, I'm pretty comfortable with who I am - whether that's "cool" or not.
• I had an AWESOME "sisters day" last Friday - despite driving all over the eastern part of Illinois. I love shopping in downtown Champaign - makes me feel millions of miles away from Spfld. Best part - Mary finding the Marching Illini hat and then wearing for the rest of the day (pictures may be available later).
• I had an older sister moment on Friday - leaving Bekah at her dorm (on only her second day of being at college). I remember that first year and being alone - just praying it goes well for her. However...she is SO much cooler than me!
• I wonder if being a girl (woman - whatever) in ministry leadership will get easier with age. I know I'm pretty lucky to live in 2005 - and that I'm blessed with many opportunities - but it can still be frustrating (sing it with me, "Oh I'm just a girl - what's my destiny? What I've succombed to is making me numb. Ooooooooh - I've had it up to here!")
• To bring some balance - I've been really excited about being part of the Church lately - and really have been enjoying my role in all of that.
• This is the last week of summer - better make it count.

Google....genius.

Oh.my.goodness.
I am really amused at myself right now!

Earlier this week I wanted lyrics and songs from an old UBC Band song (a.k.a. the David Crowder Band) - "Break My Heart".
I looked - rather hard I thought. Couldn't find a thing. Found lots of lyrics for Toni Braxton's "Unbreak my Heart" though.

Anyways,
Here's an email dialogue from this week:


On Aug 15, 2005, at 1:18 PM, Bethany wrote:
> Below is the result of your feedback form. It was submitted by
> Bethany on Mon 08/15/2005 14:18
> ----------------------------------------------------------------------
> -
>
> comments: I'm looking for lyrics and/or chords to an old UBC song
> "Break My Heart." Any info you could provide would be MOST
> appreciated. Thanks!
>

And then today I get this:

-----Original Message-----
From: Jack Parker
Sent: Tuesday, August 16, 2005 1:55 PM
To: Bethany
Subject: Re: Song Information
bethany
did you try a google search?
jack

And I was like - DUDE - Jack Parker emailed me!!! (He's in the band - he cowrote "You Alone")
And then I thought - of course I looked at google.
I started to reply, but then thought I'd do one more search just in case.
I pulled up google and didn't even have to type in the search items - they were still in my history.
What do you think I found? (On the FIRST page of results!!)
Yep - lyrics AND chords. Doh.

So I sent Mr. Parker a thankful (and probably stupid) email.

Just call me Captain Obvious - and call me weirdly star-struck.

Ditto what he said

Just read a really good post by Andrew Osenga on the topic of being a Christian who writes music in the midst of a Christian subculture. Here it is: The Third Commandment. I think he does a pretty good job of keeping personal responsibility in the forefront - but still adds something unique to this whole issue. It makes me grateful to see people who are committed to the Gospel - but not overly cynical either.

I want to be a person of depth...

...spiritually
...artistically
...relationally
...intellectually

And yet I *constantly* struggle with investing the time and energy.

I struggle because I want to be that way NOW. But I know that nothing happens overnight.

I struggle because I want it to be in ways that other people notice. But I know that the internal matters SO much more than the external.

I struggle because the everyday tasks often seem more pressing than the larger, underlying need to grow...to slow down...and keep priorities in order.

And here's the other thing. I do a lot of talking or thinking about this...but very little actual doing. Typical Bethany.

And so, month by month, week by week, and day by day...
I have to be about the things of substance, the things of value.

"Save me from those things that might distract me. Please take them away and purify my heart. I don't want to lose the eternal for the things that are passing. Cause what will I have when the world is gone if it isn't for the love that goes on and on - You're my One Thing." -rm

Breaking News for My Non-Existant Readers

Derek Webb has a podcast available on iTunes. The first segment doesn't have any music - but he tells the story of how he joined Caedmon's Call...and then some info on his upcoming album ("Mockingbird" I think). I listened to it today (on my computer - not on my ipod because - well - nevermind). Yup.

Less than Love

It's a lonely world
And everybody's grabbing what they can get
and love is wonderful you've heard
You don't know if you've seen it yet
You can't miss it when it comes
Don't settle for less than love

-The Normals

Ipod: 3 Bethany: -5

I am not cool.

I can't figure out how to sync my ipod.

And it makes me mad.

I'm so cool

I just got an ipod.

I think I could fill it up really quickly if I'm not careful.

Guess the Dictator or Sit-Com Character

I found this more than moderately amusing the other day: Guess the Dictator or Sit-Com Character.

The computer successfully guessed most of ours (although it though Lisa Turtle was Topenga).

I love summer.

Road Trip

Took a nerdy road trip this weekend - visited 3 churches in 3 states.
Had a great time though! :)

Didn't experience anything life-altering or mind-blowing - but it is always fun to be somewhere new (or old in the case of LifeSpring) and worship with other people.

Went to Parkview Christian Church in Tinley Park, IL; Mars Hill in Grand Rapids, MI; and LifeSpring Christian Church in Cincinnati.
Lots of variety - which is, as they say, the spice of life.

I tried to think of deep insights I had - but like I said - this trip wasn't like that.
Favorite things from each place?
Parkview - Singing You are God Alone - and the preacher who was just about his message - and genuine. I love it when Bible people are presented as real people.
Mars Hill - Family worship - lots of squawking babies and singing Hallelu - Praise Ye the Lord, singing all 4 verses of How Great Thou Art and seeing church in the round, SIMPLICITY and HONESTY
LifeSpring - Old friends, a challenging, thought-provoking message that was basically the preacher honestly wrestling with a passage, and a wonderful communion celebration

Actually one of my favorite things about all 3 churches was being able to hear the congregation sing loudly.

It always amazes me when I think about Sunday mornings - how so many people across the city - and across the country - and across the world are gathered together in the name of Jesus (okay, I know time zones can make things tricky...but that's besides the point).
Makes me excited to be a part of the Church.

Nothing to Say

I don't have much to say - but I wanted to be a current blogger...so....

This week's highlights:

• Leading worship for junior high students at camp - playing with my brother is fun!
• Looking forward to a weekend away
• Reading "Walking on Water" - Madeline L'Engle
• Hanging out w/ Melissa in the evenings
• I cleaned my office a bit yesterday
• 2 mix CDs from Josh - my music collection just got LOTS cooler - I love the hidden track on the new Coldplay CD - "Til Kingdom Come" - and I need to listen to more Patty Griffin and Damien Rice

Lowlights:

• My church computer randomly dying this morning
• Trying to jump up and down w/ the junior highers - not my thing
• Heat+humidity=nappy hair

Boring post - but noone reads this yet, so no worries!

Willow Creek Arts Conference

Just got back from 4 full days at the Willow Arts Conference. I thought it might be a good idea to process a bit.

I love going up there - and I know why. I can just take in all these creative things - and have good discussions with other people I'm in ministry with all year long.

Best things:

• The morning with the Nichole Nordeman concert and John Ortburg preaching. They were both very genuine - and very obviously using their gifts to God's glory. John O talked about the book of Job - and being in a spiritual winter. He re-iterated the need to acknowledge pain and suffering in our services. Good stuff...deep stuff.
• Briefly getting the chance to thank Nancy Beach - she's very genuine. I admire that.
• Seeing WC's new auditorium. Awesome. Although I was again thankful that we do not use I-Mag in our services. Noone's face should be that big...but especially mine.
• I love going to the sessions where they show us things they've done in their services or different artsy things. I don't think it's showy - I love seeing it and it makes me think of 1000 other ideas.
• Gene Appel's message Friday morning about costly love. I doubt I can do it justice in an explanation...but realizing that I cannot think more highly of myself than anyone else. Christ died for the world and loves the world.
• Getting a surprise visit from Melissa and Kira. I have great friends.
• Coming back with new ideas and fresh energy.

Pesky, lingering thoughts:

• I don't want to put Willow on a pedastal and try to be just like them - but I also don't want to look at them overly-critical or belittle their ministry. I'm on the outside looking in - and I'm just grateful for their hearts for God and His kingdom. Is that okay?
• Where is the balance in worship between giving glory to God and putting our attention on Him and ministering to people and connecting their lives with God's story? Can we do both, or are we bound to favor one at the expense of the other?
• What does moving worship "forward" really mean? When people are trying to do that, what are they really trying to do?
• One word: copyright. Enough said.
• I HAVE to make some friends outside these church walls. Non-Christian friends, specifically.

Glad to be home. And there's plenty of summer left.

I ::heart:: NY

Tonight at church the group of us who went to Brooklyn last March talked about our trip. Even though it's only been a few months since we've returned - it was amazing to see how talking about the trip and that area stirred up very strong feelings and thoughts. Nostalgic in a way.

I loved visiting Park Slope (Brooklyn neighborhood) - and God did cool things in many of us during that trip.

• I love urban areas - and it always amazes me that God knows ALL of these people as well as He knows me. I always wonder if I could live in an urban area.
• People in Park Slope have really strong perceptions of Christians - primarily political (which I don't think politics is bad - but it's definitely not the central theme of Christianity!!) and close-minded. I know the team out there is trying to break those stereotypes. How do I contribute to those perceptions here - how do I actively work against them?
• As we walked around the neighborhood, prayed for people, served people, and talked with people - my heart and eyes began to see things from a Kingdom perspective. I need to do that here in Springfield - and am glad that we're going to try this summer (www.servantrevolution.com).
• I want to go back there. Maybe this summer.
• God put together a random group of young people to go on this trip - and did really cool things in community.

www.churchofparkslope.org

Now I'm off to play in the LAST "Sound of Music" show at the Muni - por fin. It's been good, but ready to be done.

Worship

I was talking to several people this past week about how my thoughts about worship are constantly being challenged and stretched. It has been confirmed by my friends that I am a dork for reading the Christian Standard on a regular basis. I'm okay with that! This past week's issue had some articles on worship - one in particular was really good: Exploring Biblical Worship by Knofel Staton.

An excerpt:

"God does not want worship that includes him, but intentionally or unintentionally excludes a certain category of people. What is happening on the platform that includes or excludes people in the pews? Whom we exclude in the sanctuary, we will eventually ignore in the streets.

Each congregation is God’s personal vehicle for transporting his Trinitarian nature and interpersonal relationship within the Trinity to others. Every aspect of the early church’s worship in the New Testament enhanced unity amid diversity. Early Christians were devoted to the apostles’ teaching, which stresses unity amid diversity; to fellowship, which is sharing partnership with others in spite of diversity; to breaking of bread, a meal of unity; to prayer for one another; to generosity that crosses economical differences (Acts 2:42-45); and to baptism that incorporates diverse people into God’s new community. "

And then the standard question - HOW DO WE DO THAT?

Unity among diversity. What does it look like when a church is thinking about other peoples' needs before their own? How much unity is possible? This is much deeper than worship styles. Special events where churches and different groups come together are good - but what does it really look like to be unified for the sake of the Kingdom?

Summer Resolution

I am failing at this blogging thing. My goal for the summer is to make this something fun - and perhaps even share it with some people I know...or some people whose blogs I look at. Hmmm...only time shall tell!

For now - movie recommendation: Hotel Rwanda. Not an easy movie to watch, but an important movie.

What will the world be like when I'm 80?

I've been chatting w/ my cousin Tim lately on AOL instant messenger. He's in Iraq - and I'm in my friends' living room on my laptop. If I think about it much it makes my brain hurt! I've not been good about keeping in touch with him until the Christmas season, so I'm grateful for the technology.

My dad likes to play this game with my sisters - it's "what are you older than?" For example, my dad is older than TV, computers, and a bunch of other stuff - hah! I would be older than...remote controls, the internet/email, CDs/DVDs, and a few more things. Mary (my youngest sister - she's 14) says I'm old.

Last week we got to visit my Nana in Wisconsin - she'll turn 97 this month. When I realize that she was my age in the 1930s - working as a nurse in Chicago during the Great Depression - it blows my mind to think about how much change she's seen in her life.

So what will life be like if/when I'm in my 80's? As Tim would say, "I have NO idea."

Insomnia

So I've always been a night owl (runs in my family)...and at this point I've effectively established a WAY too late bedtime.

But, it doesn't help that HGTV has back to back episodes of House Hunters on at 1am.

Suzanne Whang, rock on!

Christmas commercials

On the way to Lincoln this morning, I heard 3 radio commercials with Christmas gift ideas:

#1 - Season passes to Knight's Action Park - not so funny if you've never been there, but if you have you'll understand why it is doubtful ANYone would want this.
#2 - Lotto tickets - no joke. The funny thing was that the commercial presented it as the best thing to happen to people who are bad at buying gifts. Or you could throw your money away.
#3 - Mercedes/Benz - who gets a CAR for Christmas?!?

I thought about how this could make for an example of America's consumerization of Christmas...or how people don't give meaningful gifts to the people they love...but I just thought it was funny.